**Stunned This off Ethan's Blog**
A man was walking across the road when he met with an accident. The impact was on his head which caused him to be in a coma for 2 days. When he opened his eyes, his wife was by his side. He told her (in tears), "When I was struggling with my studies in the University, I failed again and again. Sometimes I even have to re-take my papers. You were there by my side, encouraging me to go on trying." She squeezed his hands as he continued, "When I went for major interviews and failed to clinch any of the jobs, you were there, cutting out the job ads for me to apply..." He added, " ...then I started working in this little firm and finally got a big contract. I blew it because of a small mistake. But you are still there for me." His wife was in tears. The man said, "I finally got a job after being laid off for quite some time. But I never seem to be promoted and my hard work was not recognised. I remained in the same position from the day I joined the company till now. You are still beside me..." His wife's tears trickled down as she listened to him, "And now I met with an accident and when I woke up, you are here with me. There's something I'll really like to say to you..." She flung herself on the bed and hug her husband, sobbing with deep emotion. Finally her husband said, "I think you bring me bad luck."
September 11, 2003
September 10, 2003
Stress Relieverz
Stress Reliever # 1
Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?
Hubby: When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.
Wife: You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
Hubby: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, "What other problem can there be greater than this one?"
_____________________________________________________
Stress Reliever # 2
Girl: When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and lighten your burden.
Boy: It's very kind of you, darling, But I don't have any worries or troubles.
Girl: Well that's because we aren't married yet.
___________________________________________________
Stress Reliever # 3
_____________________________________________________
Stress Reliever # 4
Wife to husband: "What's your excuse for coming home at this time of the night?"
Husband to wife: "Golfing with friends, my dear."
Wife to husband: "What? At 2 am?!"
Husband to wife: "Yes, We used night clubs."
_____________________________________________________
Stress Reliever # 5
A newly married man asked his wife, "Would you have married me if my father hadn't left me a fortune?"
"Honey," the woman replied sweetly, "I'd have married you NO MATTER WHO LEFT YOU A FORTUNE"
_____________________________________________________
Stress Reliever # 6
Father to son after exam: "let me see your report card."
Son: "My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents."
_____________________________________________________
Stress Reliever # 7
"How was your blind date?" a college student asked her roommate.
"Terrible!" the roommate answered.
"He showed up in his 1932 Rolls Royce."
Wow! That's a very expensive car. What's so bad about that?"
"He was the original owner."
_____________________________________________________
Stress Reliever # 8
A teacher asked her class for sentences using the word "beans"..
"My father grows beans," said one student.
"My father cooks beans," said another.
Then little Johnny spoke up: "We are all human beans."
_____________________________________________________
Stress Reliever # 9
Interviewer to Millionaire: To whom do you owe your success as a millionaire?"
Millionaire: "I owe everything to my wife."
Interviewer: "Wow, she must be some woman. What were you before you married her?"
Millionaire: "A Billionaire"
Stress Reliever # 1
Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?
Hubby: When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.
Wife: You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
Hubby: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, "What other problem can there be greater than this one?"
_____________________________________________________
Stress Reliever # 2
Girl: When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and lighten your burden.
Boy: It's very kind of you, darling, But I don't have any worries or troubles.
Girl: Well that's because we aren't married yet.
___________________________________________________
Stress Reliever # 3
_____________________________________________________
Stress Reliever # 4
Wife to husband: "What's your excuse for coming home at this time of the night?"
Husband to wife: "Golfing with friends, my dear."
Wife to husband: "What? At 2 am?!"
Husband to wife: "Yes, We used night clubs."
_____________________________________________________
Stress Reliever # 5
A newly married man asked his wife, "Would you have married me if my father hadn't left me a fortune?"
"Honey," the woman replied sweetly, "I'd have married you NO MATTER WHO LEFT YOU A FORTUNE"
_____________________________________________________
Stress Reliever # 6
Father to son after exam: "let me see your report card."
Son: "My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents."
_____________________________________________________
Stress Reliever # 7
"How was your blind date?" a college student asked her roommate.
"Terrible!" the roommate answered.
"He showed up in his 1932 Rolls Royce."
Wow! That's a very expensive car. What's so bad about that?"
"He was the original owner."
_____________________________________________________
Stress Reliever # 8
A teacher asked her class for sentences using the word "beans"..
"My father grows beans," said one student.
"My father cooks beans," said another.
Then little Johnny spoke up: "We are all human beans."
_____________________________________________________
Stress Reliever # 9
Interviewer to Millionaire: To whom do you owe your success as a millionaire?"
Millionaire: "I owe everything to my wife."
Interviewer: "Wow, she must be some woman. What were you before you married her?"
Millionaire: "A Billionaire"
My Hong Kong Photos & A Trip to the Beautiful Pangkor Isle
Pls Do not copy to store on ur PC k.....thank you..I m not joking
Pls Do not copy to store on ur PC k.....thank you..I m not joking
You don't have to restrict yourself to open coffeeshop? anymore. Neither do you have to resort to ang mor equivalents like, the barn door is open?, etc. TalkingCock.com brings you some uniquely Singaporean ways to tell someone their zipper is down?
20. Your condo today open house, ah?
19. Shhh! Your ISD agent is peeping at us.
18. Mini-Me is making a break for the escape pod.
17. You've got Windows on your laptop.
16. National Day is over, how come you're still on parade?
15. You've gone past the OB Marker.
14. I see you've taken out your bottle of Newater.
13. Showing the foreign talent around, eh?
12. There's been a prisoner breakout at Changi.
11. Your car has just left the Restricted Zone.
10. Admiral Teo is trying to apply for shore leave.
9. Your laundry pole is hanging out the window.
8. I see parliament has just come out of session.
7. Your Proton Saga is not parked all the way into the lot.
6. I see you're showing TalkingCock the Movie.
5. You're now driving along the Tampines Expressway.
4. Buangkok Station open oreddy.
3. A rare bird has just escaped from the Bird Park.
2. I see your little brother is in the Through Train programme.
1. Your MP is holding a Meet the People session.
http://www.TalkingCock.com 2001-2003. All rights reserved.
20. Your condo today open house, ah?
19. Shhh! Your ISD agent is peeping at us.
18. Mini-Me is making a break for the escape pod.
17. You've got Windows on your laptop.
16. National Day is over, how come you're still on parade?
15. You've gone past the OB Marker.
14. I see you've taken out your bottle of Newater.
13. Showing the foreign talent around, eh?
12. There's been a prisoner breakout at Changi.
11. Your car has just left the Restricted Zone.
10. Admiral Teo is trying to apply for shore leave.
9. Your laundry pole is hanging out the window.
8. I see parliament has just come out of session.
7. Your Proton Saga is not parked all the way into the lot.
6. I see you're showing TalkingCock the Movie.
5. You're now driving along the Tampines Expressway.
4. Buangkok Station open oreddy.
3. A rare bird has just escaped from the Bird Park.
2. I see your little brother is in the Through Train programme.
1. Your MP is holding a Meet the People session.
http://www.TalkingCock.com 2001-2003. All rights reserved.
hmmm...was reading thru some of my journals....not these online ones but those i hand written...i remembered one of those written during 1995....i was going thru a bad patch...a rather rough one...almost left church...almost lost sight of the light at the tunnel
" i was crying out to the Lord one night, I heard an audible voice going,"Do not give up a Perfect God for imperfect Men". I was totally flabbergasted at this revelation....it struck a chord within me...why am i struggling to giveup everything for some pple who are purposely doing somethings to turn me off...why am i giving up coz the pple ard me are giving up...why am i following wat the rest of the gang is doing....why am i following their gossipping and retailating ways....why am i ....why...why...why "
Today is like 8 years down the road, i no longer am affected at who leaves church or tries to talk bad abt some pple in church. Pls do not be mistaken...not that i do not have a compassionate heart but just that i have resoluted in my own heart that i will not follow them no matter how close or kum-qin they r with me...i have learnt to discern my frenz....this is a lesson i learnt thru these 8 years...really apart from all those bible lessons and knowledge within me...this is one of those truths which i abide by....
why am i blogging like this...i am reminded of those days today when i saw someone from those days this morning...hahaha...i am a person who values frenship above all else...really....i will never leave a fren in the lurch one lor...i am a firm believer in yi qi through my many years of influence from my elders...sigh
" i was crying out to the Lord one night, I heard an audible voice going,"Do not give up a Perfect God for imperfect Men". I was totally flabbergasted at this revelation....it struck a chord within me...why am i struggling to giveup everything for some pple who are purposely doing somethings to turn me off...why am i giving up coz the pple ard me are giving up...why am i following wat the rest of the gang is doing....why am i following their gossipping and retailating ways....why am i ....why...why...why "
Today is like 8 years down the road, i no longer am affected at who leaves church or tries to talk bad abt some pple in church. Pls do not be mistaken...not that i do not have a compassionate heart but just that i have resoluted in my own heart that i will not follow them no matter how close or kum-qin they r with me...i have learnt to discern my frenz....this is a lesson i learnt thru these 8 years...really apart from all those bible lessons and knowledge within me...this is one of those truths which i abide by....
why am i blogging like this...i am reminded of those days today when i saw someone from those days this morning...hahaha...i am a person who values frenship above all else...really....i will never leave a fren in the lurch one lor...i am a firm believer in yi qi through my many years of influence from my elders...sigh
September 9, 2003
Keep the Christians Satisfied
Note from Max: The following message was transcribed from a recent strategy lesson Satan gave to his demons. Read it so that you will be aware of his scheme. II Cor. 2:11
by: Max Lucado
Don't make Christians angry, for then they will act. Don't make Christians defensive, for then they will think. Don't overwhelm Christians with the immensity of their task, for then they will pray. No, the strategy for the Christian culture is satisfaction - for satisfaction spawns complacency.
Make the Christian satisfied. Make him satisfied to be a pretty good person. Teach him to be satisfied with who he is and what he has accomplished. If he starts trying to put away some old habits or prejudices, tell him that everyone is entitled to a vice or two and to enjoy life while he still can. If he feels bad over what Christians call "sin," then teach him to compare himself with the likes of Adolf Hitler and Mussolini...that will make him feel like a saint.
Encourage the Christian to exalt mediocrity. Remind him daily of all the reasons he can't have an impact on the world (he's not bright enough, he doesn't have time, he was potty-trained too early, etc.). Tell him that people like Abraham Lincoln, Martin Luther King, and Winston Churchill were born with a silver spoon in their mouths. They were destined for greatness. And then keep the history books out of his hands so he won't see the truth.
More specifically, make the Christian satisfied with the size of his congregation. Train him to close his eyes at the thousands around his church that are lost and just be happy with the few hundred with-in his church that are saved. Take from his heart any compassion or sorrow as he drives through the city.
Numb his conscience to the spiritual plight of his working associates and neighbors. Keep the Christian satisfied. Whisper in his ear that empty pews are just a sign of the times. If he hears about a church that is growing, be quick to tell him that their growth is a sign of their liberalism and that small numbers are the price you have to pay to preserve tradition, uh, I mean truth.
Yes, keep the Christian satisfied. If he is satisfied where he is, then he will never envision where he can be. If he is satisfied with the present, then he will never dream about the future. If he is satisfied to be average, then he will never try to be great. So let him be an average Christian.
For, in reality, an average Christian is no Christian at all.
Note from Max: The following message was transcribed from a recent strategy lesson Satan gave to his demons. Read it so that you will be aware of his scheme. II Cor. 2:11
by: Max Lucado
Don't make Christians angry, for then they will act. Don't make Christians defensive, for then they will think. Don't overwhelm Christians with the immensity of their task, for then they will pray. No, the strategy for the Christian culture is satisfaction - for satisfaction spawns complacency.
Make the Christian satisfied. Make him satisfied to be a pretty good person. Teach him to be satisfied with who he is and what he has accomplished. If he starts trying to put away some old habits or prejudices, tell him that everyone is entitled to a vice or two and to enjoy life while he still can. If he feels bad over what Christians call "sin," then teach him to compare himself with the likes of Adolf Hitler and Mussolini...that will make him feel like a saint.
Encourage the Christian to exalt mediocrity. Remind him daily of all the reasons he can't have an impact on the world (he's not bright enough, he doesn't have time, he was potty-trained too early, etc.). Tell him that people like Abraham Lincoln, Martin Luther King, and Winston Churchill were born with a silver spoon in their mouths. They were destined for greatness. And then keep the history books out of his hands so he won't see the truth.
More specifically, make the Christian satisfied with the size of his congregation. Train him to close his eyes at the thousands around his church that are lost and just be happy with the few hundred with-in his church that are saved. Take from his heart any compassion or sorrow as he drives through the city.
Numb his conscience to the spiritual plight of his working associates and neighbors. Keep the Christian satisfied. Whisper in his ear that empty pews are just a sign of the times. If he hears about a church that is growing, be quick to tell him that their growth is a sign of their liberalism and that small numbers are the price you have to pay to preserve tradition, uh, I mean truth.
Yes, keep the Christian satisfied. If he is satisfied where he is, then he will never envision where he can be. If he is satisfied with the present, then he will never dream about the future. If he is satisfied to be average, then he will never try to be great. So let him be an average Christian.
For, in reality, an average Christian is no Christian at all.
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