May 2, 2005

Tink itz been awhile since i last wrote on anything...

Hahaha.. maybe a haha or a lolx would be a good front for me to display..
To hide these emotions of mine .. To put up a facade..
A display of emotions would be probaly deemed as weak..

Many times i find myself falling into the pits of self-despair & alot of 'whys'..

I've managed to pick myself up each time and made myself trudge on..

I do not tink that i m able to do it w/o Jesus's help..
i really wanna thank God for him..
For bringing me thru these 4 terrible mths..
For being with me when i was utterly disgusted with myself..
For being with me when i was lying in my void deck KO-ed..
For being with me at every single instance when i was alone and in despair...

Being in denial abt things are not good.. really.. yesterday i caught a show.. the show was the 'ekin cheng / aaron kwok show'.. very nice.. but i really empathise and sympathise with aaron's role... Nan ren zui Tong.. do u know wat it is..

It is to be left w/o a reason.. A guy is logical and would want things to be explained.. logically.. but nonetheless the other parties never realise this and always expects us to be in the know.. We're just your partners.. not the ringworm in your tummy.. we need to be told and instructed if necessary ..

i dunno why m i writing all these but i felt alot after the show and felt a need to put it down to remind myself of not to fall in love again.. itz beta to just give ur heart to Jesus.. he definitely will not hurt u ..

Imperfect humans do it senselessly & unswervingly.. only a perfect God would know how to handle a delicate heart