Long Post Ahead

Last week, i put 'Lemme go quietly' on my msn nick... Alot of pple asked me where am i going that i need to go quietly...

I wanna go to a place where there is no work, no one asking "where's your other half", "where is your office", "where is your car", "where is your apartment"..

I hate living up to other pple's expectations..
I hate beign someone i am not...

I've persisted soo long to be myself..
Yet sometimes situations do not allow me to do so..
the circumstances make me to be who i am not..

I wanna stand tall and high against the tirade..
Issit that tough

Many times, i tried to stand and not fall,
Only to be pushed down again and again..

Its liken to Fate throwing u a ten when u need an ace...

I hate this feeling...

Wanna throw up and fall sick...

UPDATE @ 12:42PM



Probably its true; Probably its not

we are afterall only human... tends to compare stuff religiously...
I was blog surfing earlier last week when i found out some stuff... apparently some pple gotten hitched without telling me for obvious reasons... guess it only signifies the end.. afterall i did say b4 my wait of 2 yrs has to come to nothing but an end... but ,many times i really really do not understand why...

Things like why i cannot give it up
Why i still feel the way i am when i know i shouldn't...
Can anyone tell me why..

Dun bother.. i know what's gonna come out.. is those "Dun worry.. Time will heal" "You will find another one true love" "You will get over it"

WTF

just now as i walked into that bubble lift, i started to do something.. i stared out into the open fields.. i saw the circle line construction.. it was deep.. many pple were working.. i wonder if i were to fall into that hole... wat would happen..

My life's an abyss now.. i dunno wat came over me but still i feel wretched.. i need a sobering cold shower... will go to gym later tonite.. to get rid of my thots & that someone...



UPDATE @ 1:42PM

If only it is only that simple...