Been awhile since i last blogged... Today's the 3rd last day of my long leave... Been like slackin thru it all.. Sleep , Eat & Drink only... Sigh...

Met up with a couple of old buddies over the CNY.. Really great to see them again.. Been having alot of mixed feelings approachin this year's Vday.. Not that i dun have things to do..

I could be still in bangkok and not return till the 15th... But i chose to come back... chose to see if we could meet up for dinner on that nite.. Nothing happens by chance.. Everything is planned and drilled to precision by the executioner..

I took the gamble to invite her for dinner and if the outcome is wat i tink it would be,

So be it...

Many might ask me
why are you taking it so hard...
why are you sooo stupid...
why are you so thick skinned / numb-skulled...

Reason is only 1..
I still love her with all my heart despite all that has happened..
Really..
Yes I might seem incredibily stoopid to all those who knows wat actually happened..

But have you guys tried loving someone with all your heart..
It really takes all your breath away...

I admit dat i m a loser... so wat ...
this is me..
A loser in a dying game hoping to win back something that seems to be drifting further & further away ..